JUDGEMENT!: True Grit

True Grit is a remake of an old John Wayne film with the same title. No, I’ve never seen the original and have no desire to. I don’t have an Public Enemy type hatred of the guy. But at this point in my life he is more of a character of himself than anything else. I also trusted the great actors in this film to bring something new to the table and didn’t want to be influenced in any way. This version was directed be the Coen Brothers (O Brother, Where Art Thou?, No Country For Old Men, Fargo) and I loved everything they did with it.

Hallie Seinfeld (Son of Tuscon) stars as Mattie Ross, a young girl whose father was murdered for some gold coins and a horse. She arrives in this small town and spends the night sleeping in the mortuary with her father and three other men she sees hung for various crimes. She is a very smart child with fantastic bargaining skills. She hires Jeff Bridges (The Big Lebowski, Tron, Iron Man, The Men Who Stare At Goats) playing Rooster Cogburn, an alcoholic, chain smoking bounty hunter to track the man who killed her father for $50. Reluctantly he agrees.

JUDGEMENT!: Enter the Void

I woke up today still feeling off-kilter from the previous night’s endeavor. After seeing Gaspar Noe’s Enter the Void one can only be so lucky as to call their disposition ‘slightly off-kilter.’ While I realize that every other critic has taken the opportunity to quip something along the lines of Noe’s work being an “assault,” it’s very hard to write anything adverse to this notion or even ancillary to it. Simply put, Noe’s recent work is a difficult watch, and not strictly for its content, but rather, its style.

JUDGEMENT!: Hereafter

 
Clint Eastwood has a long and storied professional history that spans across half a century and includes some of the most prolific titles of all time as well as some of the most memorable Oscar contenders of the last ten years.  His latest flick, Hereafter, is certainly not one of those aforementioned movies.

JUDGEMENT!: Bronson

Bronson tries to do everything a biopic should do, and then some.  It looks to portray its subject’s life in a unique, personal fashion toying with conventions, tone, and pacing to create a story thread true to its central character.  And while, at times, the biopic manages to do exactly that with a starved, exasperated, solitary pacing, this very same element also manages to grind the film to a halt at times and forces the audience to linger on moments and points in the criminal’s life that we simply could have done without.

JUDGEMENT!: Splice

With every fiber of my being I, Alex Hluch, wanted to write this review objectively. I wanted to use the most academic cinematic language possible and write candidly, but without bias or humor, on the film at hand. Unfortunately, I find now that I simply cannot do that. Splice is a movie that attempts to do so much in such a short amount of time. And while certain aspects of the film actually shine through rather nicely and create a seamless image at times on screen, nothing can truly buoy the absurdly fluctuating tone of the film and the insane character development and plot progression.

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 6

“Can we talk about Gary Oldman for a minute…?” - Alex

“I treat books like I treat sex. So I rush through it real fast ’cause I’m having too much fun.” - Dante

In this episode Dante and Alex cover everything from book reviews, how far kids should go in adult behavior in film, books becoming movies or TV shows, the latest DVD’s they have watched, rant about films and their outrageous budgets, whether Summer Glau is attractive or not, the weekend box office totals, how awesome Gary Oldman is, and the Top 5 Assholes of Cinema. Click here to download and listen to this and other DNA Shows!

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 5

“In the last 30 minutes after Superman battles nothing but existentialism…” - Alex

“Paul Giamanni looked so pained in this film because some tragedy struck him. No. Its because he read the script and said ‘Yes.” - Dante

Dante and Alex cook up something special in this episode. The top movies of the weekend are covered, movie trailers for Cowboys Versus Aliens and I Am Number 4 are reviewed, new superhero TV shows are discussed, they also create their own versions of Ghostbusters, and a Top 5 Worst Films are given and ripped a new asshole. Click here to download this and other DNA Shows!

JUDGEMENT!: Megamind

I wasn’t too excited to see this film. I already knew that the animation wasn’t the kind I liked. Listen to me already bitching before I even name the damned movie. It’s funny because after watching for about five minutes I said to myself “This could have easily been a cheaper animated series or a live action film.” The way it looked seemed really flat at times.

Megamind stars Will Ferrell (Talladega Nights, Anchorman, Blades Of Glory) as, uh, Megamind. He is a villain that crashed to Earth only to land in a prison and taught that being good was bad. Brad Pitt (Troy, Fight Club, Mr. & Mrs. Smith) is Metro Man, also someone who crashed to Earth but landed with a rich family and grew up with everything that he wanted. These two grow up together and begin a rivalry that lasts for decades.

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 4

“I have never seen so much rape!” - Alex

“I’m waiting for her to show her snatch in the next film!” - Dante

On this episode of The DNA Show topics include the new Green Lantern movie, Green Hornet, Harry Potter and the new film making too much money, how actors need to be treated, Daniel Day-Lewis as Abraham Lincoln, Lindsey Lohan being dropped from the Linda Lovelace biopic, Chloe Sevigny giving real blowjobs in film, Alex gives advice for girls being filmed giving blowjobs, Alex reviews Willy Wonka (both versions), and finally a Top 5 List of The Best Nude Scenes In A Movie are discussed as they expound on the awesomeness of boobs. Click here to download this and past DNA Shows!

JUDGEMENT!: Due Date

I watched Due Date and laughed my ass off. I have been hearing a lot of people talking trash about this film and I don’t appreciate it. It was funny, damn you. It’s from the same guy (Todd Phillips) who directed The Hangover (which I hated) and Old School (which I loved). So this seems to be the film that is drawing a line in the sand apparently.

The film stars Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man, Sherlock Holmes, Tropic Thunder) as a guy who is trying to get home to see his wife give birth for the very first time. But there’s a problem. It starts with a car door being knocked off and ends with him on a no fly list. The cause of most of the drama in this film is Zach Galifianakis (The Hangover, Dinner For Schmucks). Knowing that they are both heading to Los Angeles Downey decides to ride with this mad man. Now he isn’t mad in a crazy sense, but he is fucking loony. Oh, and he has his little dog and his fathers ashes in a coffee cup.

JUDGEMENT!: The Walking Dead

I was finally able to watch The Walking Dead that debuted on AMC Halloween night. I had read the comic book but gave up on it due to the slow developing story, the lateness of the issues, and the art that seemed to become lazy. This is the problem I have with most comics so when I hear that one is being made into a movie, especially one that isn’t done, I worry. In this case my worries were unfounded.

The series starts off with Officer Rick Grimes and his partner Shane Walsh talking about issues in their respective relationships only to be interrupted by a call to assist in a high speed chase. Grimes is shot by one of the assailants and awakens in the hospital after an unknown amount of time. He stumbles through then hospital finding bodies strewn about, a door that contains “The Dead” and body bags littering the parking lot outside of the hospital. Grimes makes his way home to find it empty (his wife Lori and his son Carl either dead or gone) after confronting half a corpse that moans at him.

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 3

 Dante & Alex are back once again and this time they come loaded with movie reviews such as Red, Hereafter, and Saw 3D. A new Top 5 segment featuring The Best Fight Films is also introduced along with the regular nonsense that only The DNA Show can provide. Click here to download and listen to this and other DNA shows!

JUDGEMENT!: Saw 3D

This is a fucked up film. Let me get that out of the way first. I started watching all of the Saw films back in 2008 which is a lot of gore to cram in over a weekend. I’m not a fan of many new horror films. Most of them are just a bunch of unlikable assholes that you don’t care about when they die. Back in the day (no, wait, don’t walk away!) there were nerds, sluts, jocks, assholes, and the Black dude. Lots of characters. Now no one is worth cheering for. Look at Human Centipede. I didn’t care that those girls got their faces sewn to assholes (literally) and made to march and eat poop.

JUDGEMENT!: Red

Last week I had to pleasure of hanging out at The Grove here in Los Angeles and seeing the newest Bruce Willis action film Red. To be completely honest, I really didn’t want to see this movie. I’d heard bad reviews from sites I respected and heard that it veered very far off from the comic book that it was based off of. After being burned by terrible comic book based films like Wanted I had decided not to waste my time or money on this film. Damn, I’m glad I was talked into seeing this.

JUDGEMENT!: No Ordinary Family

Welcome to yet another installment of JUDGEMENT! From your baby’s daddy Dante. I may not have the writing skills of your White Shadow Alex Hluch but damn it, I am good at bitching. On the previous episodes of The DNA Show I have spent time complaining about this show No Ordinary Family on ABC. This show has suffered from the same problem many other super hero based television shows have but in record time. Too many people with powers.

The show starts with this family that doesn’t seem to get along all that well. Everyone in the house is distant or in a hurry to get away from each other. While on a trip in a bionic ass storm they crash land into the sea and everyone survives but the pilot. They arrive home and everything is business as usual.

JUDGEMENT!: Let Me In

Hey DNA-ers!  (Man, I gotta work on that)  This is Alex with another review of Hollywood's recent offerings.  This particular review is of Matt Reeves' remake, Let Me In.  Enjoy?  Enjoy!

Despite the fact that I am an unabashed opponent of 90% of all remakes done in cinema, there is occasionally an actual, valid excuse for producing one.  Whether time has lapsed and a story of yesteryear feels as though it can benefit from being reincarnated in the present pop-culture landscape (Ocean’s Eleven), or a director has been saving a passion project for years that he feels can only be served best by his own, personal spin on the tale (The Fly), there are reasonable means for endeavoring a remake of a production.  Unfortunately, Let Me In does not contain a single one of them. 

JUDGEMENT!: The Expendables, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, Machete

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

This was a film based in Toronto (Canada not California) and directed by Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) who is an awesome director. It stars Michael Cera (Superbad, Juno) as Scott Pilgrim, a guy who plays in a band called Sex Bob-Omb. He falls for a chick named Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) after she passes through one of his dreams. She can do it because she is American and they don’t do this in Canada.

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 2

In this heavily superhero themed episode Dante and Alex discuss No Ordinary Family and how it fails on so many levels, the cursed Transformers 3 set, the upcoming Spiderman film, Emma Stone, the re-re-re-re-release of Star Wars in 3D, whether or not 3D is bankable or not, debating George Lucas’ credibility as a film maker, the latest news on The Avengers movie, Batman, who we would cast as villains, Mark Ruffalo as the new Hulk, Joss Whedon and his movie credits. Remember, sharing is caring. So if you like the show click here to download this and older shows.

JUDGEMENT!: The Social Network

Hey gang!  And by gang I mean the two people who accidentally stumble across our page a day!  It's your friendly-neighborhood Alex here with a new component that I hope to bring to The DNA Show.  Along with our podcasts in which Dante and I cover multitudes of pop culture all in a handy-dandy audio format, I'm also going to be posting in-depth written critiques of current entertainment endeavors.  First off, I'd like to start off our adventures on this site with David Fincher's The Social Network.  These posts will also be uploaded on my personal website, Shwayblog, so feel free to drop by either or and gives me the traffics! <3

The Dante & Alex Show Episode 1

In our inaugural show we discuss the latest films such as Social Network and Let Me In. We also debate what merits being remade and how long studios should wait until a movie is remade. Pushing Daisies, Dead Like Me, and the latest fall shows (including the ones being canceled) are talked about. In our Classics section American Psycho is praised for its lunacy while The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo's sequels are skewered. Whether John Lennon and many other dead musicians should be praised as saints is also gone over in our first (hopefully of many) new DNA Shows! Click here to download and share this show on your own sites.